Grasping at Smoke
by emberrox42
Summary: Batgirl-Barbra Gordan is new on the bat team, but she's already passed the final. She's tired of Robin teasing her, even though she knows why. Then, on top of Wayne Tower, everything goes wrong. K for violence.
1. The Begining

HI

HI! This is my third story, so I'm kinda getting the hang of it…

Disclaimer: Yes, I can draw. No, I didn't draw the Batman comics, nor the Batgirl comics. And, no, I am not a boy, so I can't possibly be the person who owns them, now can I?

Dear Diary,

So, Pixie boots is annoying me so much. Dad found the broken bar in my window, fixed it, and now I'm relying on the Boy Wonder to spring me. Of course, He's giving me H-E- double hockey sticks about it… I "met" him the other day, for the "second time". Dad freaked out because I said "Yo" back to his "Hi" instead of "GO AWAY YOU CREEPY GUY IN SHORT PANTS!!" (**A/n: if you can't read that, it's go away you creepy guy in short pants)**Right… Oh, here's Pixie Boots. Gotham calls.

Barbra Gordon

"A diary, huh?" I looked up.

"You can't even try to scare me. I've gotten used to you bats, Pixie Boots." I retorted. I shoved my diary under the bed_. _He's so cocky. Twerp's got a lot to learn still, even though we're partners.

"Come on Batgirl. I've got your Bat-wheels, so let's bat- go." Robin said. I was sure my face lit up about a hundred watts.

"You brought me a new Bat-cycle?" I hopped off the bed. He tossed me my boots and my cowl. "Yo, grab my gloves, will ya?"

"Sure, now come on, before your dad wakes up." Pixie Boots muttered. "And, yes, I got you a new Bat-cycle. Or rather, Batman did. I personally don't see the point since you crash each one as soon as you get it."

"Hey, the first one took me five hours." I protested.

"Yeah, and the second one five minutes."

"You're exaggerating." I mumbled as I knelt down to pick the lock on the door.

"I already got the lock on the outside."

"No, duh. That's the only reason I need you." I shot back. "I am an expert at sneaking out you know." That's it Babsy. Baffle him so he'll shut up_._ I popped the lock, and Robin opened the door.

"After you."

"Such a gentleman" I replied, sarcasm dripping from my voice.

"Let's go." Batman said. I shuddered. That voice though, it's like wind over gravestones. It can't be natural.

"Sorry Pixie Boots, Batman's just got some scare factor that you don't have. Maybe it's because when you pop out of nowhere, you have this voice that's about two octaves higher than Batman's." I teased, hopping over the side of my bike. "Hey Batman. Thanks for the bike. I'll try not to crash it."

"Hello Batgirl, but I'm afraid you are wrong. You can try all you like, but something's going to happen to your bike. It always does, whether I'm in Tibet or right here, you'll still probably crash." Batman replied.

"Wow Batman, I'm impressed. You just made a joke. Amazing." Robin interjected.

"Turn right." Batman said. We were speeding across Gotham, and I could see Grand Avenue coming up.

"Where are we going?" I asked.

"Wayne tower, ironically. Sighting of the Joker." Batman answered. "Man, I've always wanted one of his purple suits." Robin complained.

"Why don't you ask him? I'm sure he'd give his least favorite superhero a purple suit. Or you could pretend to be the pizza guy, and when he asks what he owes you, you can say a purple suit." I laughed for real this time.

"He'd probably kill the pizza guy if he didn't give him the pizza free. Hey, what's up with your bike?" I looked up at Robin, startled.

"There's something wrong with my bike?"

"It's having trouble keeping up." He replied.

"Huh." The Bat-cycle puttered to a stop bucking me off. Not good, especially in Gotham traffic on the busiest road! I flung myself off to the side, and rolled onto the sidewalk. A motorbike stopped in front of me. Great. Here's the Boy Wonder to mock me and act all high and mighty.

"Need a hand?"

"No." I hissed. I pushed myself up. "My bike was out of gas, by the way."

"Are you ok?" Batman asked, pulling over to a halt.

"Yeah. Just fine. It was out of gas. Now don't we have a clown to catch?"

Just because they've been in the business longer doesn't mean that they have to rub it in my face. "I can ride other motorcycles just fine, so it must just be your bikes." I'll teach them to make fun of me.

"You better destroy the bat evidence. And you won't get anywhere on jump lines. Ride on Robin's Bat-cycle." Batman ordered. They booted up their bikes. And this one lasted a grand total of… 17 minutes. Just perfect. I flipped the self destruct switch and slid into place on Robin's bike.

"Yo, this bike isn't made for tandem riding. Lean into turns, I don't want road rash." I snapped. We had to get there, before my dad and the rest of the G.C.P.D. showed up. We had to make it to Wayne Tower. We had a clown to catch.


	2. The near end

It's me… So, no reviews… can someone fix that for me?

Disclaimer: Barbra Gordon rules, therefore I don't own her… or Bats and yeah… anyone…

We sped to Wayne Tower, me on the back of Pixie Boots' bike. Fun.

"Hey, you're slipping!" Robin noted

"Good thing we're here than." I muttered. I soooo don't like the position I'm in. Flipping over Robin and his bike, I land.

"Barbra Gordon, Olympic Gold medalist! Yes! And she wins it!" I cheer.

"Yeah right." Boy Dork-o snorted.

"For your information, I am training to be in the Olympics." I shot back.

"Watch what you say, BATGIRL." Batman interjected. Uh-oh. I said Barbra. Dumb Barbra dumb!

"Right Batman." I mumbled.

"Rookie mistake." Robin cut in. I have a feeling he's trying to make me feel better.

"Just like it was a rookie mistake for you to forget to gas up my Batcycle." I remarked.

"Ouch." Ha. Teach him to make fun of me. If he thinks I'll become his girlfriend by one upping me, he's got another thing coming.

"Come on." Bats said. He handed Dick and me suction cups.

"We're gonna climb up Wayne Tower?" Robin whined.

"Grappling guns are too loud. Now Joker has a woman upon Wayne Tower whom he's trying to convince to jump off. Batgirl, you save the woman, Robin and I will take care of joker." Great. Now I'm getting the grunt work. I stuck my suction cups to the tower.

"See Robin? This is why gymnastics and Tae Kwan Do come in handy. Upper body strength, you know?" I stated. He stuck out his tongue.

"Trapeze" We were almost to the top when I finally spoke again.

"See? That wasn't so bad." I whispered to him.

"My aching limbs." he replied.

"It won't be so bad, see? That garbage bin is full of candy! You hit in the bin, and you'll be fine! HAHAHAHA!" Indefinitely, the Joker.

"But, I don't see any candy." The woman protested. "I just see trash."

"Listen lady. Either you jump, or I shoot you, but either way you're going off the edge." I survey the scene. I need to act quickly. He has a hostage and a gun. A fall from that height would kill her, trash bin or no. Batman and Robin vault over the edge.

"Joke's over Joker." Robin taunted. This is my cue. I hop over the edge when Joker's not looking. I make a bee line for the lady standing on the edge of the tower. Robin gives me a thumbs up, and I whisper to the woman.

"My name's Batgirl. Please ma'am, I'm going to get you to safety. Just come with me." I wrapped my arm around her waist just as a Joker fish went off. Acting quickly, I force my Re-breather over her mouth, and send her to the ground safely with a bat-erang and de-cel cord. Bursting out in a fit of giggles, I draw the Joker's attention to me.

"No!" he hissed as he saw the woman being safely lowered to the ground.

"Where's your Re-breather?" Robin mouthed. I pointed over the edge at the woman. He nodded. That's when it hit.

Now keep this in mind, I've been shot before. But never in the chest, strong enough to force me off the side. My sternum is probably shattered. And, worst of all, I gave my jumpline to the woman. I'm going down. Blood is spilling all over my jumpsuit. Poor Alfred, having to wash it. The weight of my eyes is too much. Closing them I hope that I die before I hit the sidewalk.

"NO!!" I hear Robin screaming.

"I'm sorry Robin, it's too late. I can't save her. She's already dead." Batman muttered. NO! I'm not dead! Please save me! Please! I try to open my eyes to show them that I'm not dead, but I can't. The last thing I hear before I black out is Robin whispering

"I can't watch." and a maniacal laughter.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.


	3. Worse than death?

I'm back. I guess. Er… how's about I start writing?

Disclaimer: Sadly enough, don't own them. If I did, this would be a comic book. Not a fanfiction. Sorry.

The thing about falling unconscious is that (a) you often find yourself somewhere that you weren't when you lost consciousness, and (b), it isn't pleasant. Because, apparently, I didn't die. And you know what? I hurt like h-e-c-k. I'm talking full out wish you were dead, shouldn't anyone with this kinda pain already be dead sorta pain. Major owie. Then, I remember. I guess I should be in a lot of pain seeing as I got shot off a building. Usually Alfred has me patched up by now. What's taking him so long? Not that I don't appreciate Alfred's wonderful doctory and how hard it is, but I'm in a lot of pain here.

"Misteh J, I don't get the plan." Harley? Maybe that's why Alfred hasn't patched me up yet. Where the heck am I?

"What do you mean you don't get the plan? It's simple!" The Joker shot back.

"Well, how are we gonna draw Batman and Robin out? They think that she's dead, pudding." What? Draw them out? Oh my gosh, I've been kidnapped! That would explain it. Gah!! It's a trap! I've got to warn Batman! But they think I'm dead… I try unsuccessfully to keep my eyes from watering.

"The Bat signal of course. We call him there, and then tell him we're holding her ransom. He comes where we tell him, because he feels he's failed her and would do whatever he could to save her, then we get the money, while drawing him and the bird boy into our trap, and we get revenge! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Well, that simplifies things. Now I know his plan. I groan softly.

"She's waking Misteh J."

"Good. If you hadn't broken her vertebrae when you caught her she probably would have woke sooner." I guess that explains my back pain. And here I thought I was old. Ha! Keeping my humor at a time like this. Robin would be proud. I opened my eyes. And shrieked. A pasty white clown face was staring straight into my eyes. Harley.

"How ya doin' hon?" She asked, her psychiatrist side coming out.

"Now that's no laughing matter. I'm tied up, in pain, really cranky, and don't you dare hit me!" I screamed.

"How'd you know?" Joker asked, surprised. He dropped Harley's hammer.

"I have ESP." I spit. At least I've still got my humor. Kinda: I'm having trouble coming up with cracks. Maybe my jokes aren't all they're cracked up to be. Ha! Get it? Never mind… While I was caught up in thought, Joker had picked up Harley's hammer again, and swung it. It made contact.

"OW! For the love of Athena, WHAT"D YOU DO THAT FOR?" I shrieked. Harley winced at the blood gushing down my face. Is my nose broken? Probably not, since I can still talk.

"Uh… all the kidnappers put their kidnapee's through tough times. I saw it on TV." The Joker replied.

"But that just makes the hero angrier, so then they beat up the bad guy, save the kidnapee, and then have a party or something like that. Don't you watch TV Joker? Or are you a channel flipper? And since when do you care what's normal? Don't you go out of your way to not be normal?" I laughed.

"Um… good point. But, what TV says goes!" Joker howled. His fist made contact, and I spit up blood all over his suit.

"Ooh… ouch, blood stains are tough to get out. Try cold water and bleach." I hiss. If only I wasn't tied up, Joker would be dead meat. Meat and blood… maybe I'm hungry.

I notice Harley looking away, but before I can react, Joker's foot crashes into my chest. Definitely heard the crack of a rib. "You idiot! Never hit someone where they've been shot! It hurts!" I yelped.

"Point noted." Joker laughed as I felt his fist connect with my face. Harley gasped, (what was with that?) and ugh…

GRASPING AT SMOKE/ GRASPING AT SMOKE/ GRASPING AT SMOKE/ (TIME BREAK)

So, while I was snoozing, Batman and Robin were answering the Bat signal. Or, at least, Batman was answering, and Robin was tagging along miserably. Poor kid. Any who, you know? I'm not the greatest at narrating when I'm supposed to be out cold. So, Batman and Robin landed on the roof top.

"I feel bad about answering this call since she can't." Robin muttered. Awww! How nice. Too bad he can't realize that I'm NOT DEAD.

"Robin, get your head in the game. Channel your anger, but keep your head clear." Batman replied. Dude, that guy's really not the best councilor.

"Batty- boob me boy! Long time no see! Oouh...What's with Birdo?" Joker cackled. Get this, Robin tried to charge him! Batman grabbed his cape and held him back.

"Robin, no!" Batman hissed.

"You (BEEP)! I hate you, you (BEEPING) clown!!" Robin screamed.

"OOH. Someone's holding a grudge… How about a bar of soap for that language?" Joker squealed.

"SHE WAS MY BEST FRIEND!" Robin yelled, his voice cracking.

"Was? My bird boy, you can't give up on your little Bat-ka-doodle just yet! She's strong, she's smart, she's feisty, and she's up for ransom! Two million dollars worth that is!" Robin stopped straining.

"She's… Tell him we'll pay Batman; tell him we'll do it!" He cried. And I mean _cried._ Pixie boots _cried!_ That's a new one on me.

"How do we know you're telling the truth?" Batman asked. Joker handed him two sheets of paper. Batman accepted them, but he had to let go of Robin. Luckily, the Boy Wonder didn't notice, and didn't maul Joker. He was too busy muttering to himself.

"Batgirl's not dead? She's alive and being held for ransom? She's alive?"

So, while Robin gained a new level of mentalness, Batman was staring at the photograph in his hand. It was of me, masked and costumed, (YES! Secret identity SAFE!) tied up to a pole, bruised and battered. And also there was an address.

"Meet me there tomorrow at midnight if you ever want to see batgirl again. You bring two million dollars, and I'll bring Batgirl."

Meanwhile, I am waking from my snooze-a- palooza. And, the first thing I see? Harley. That must be some kinda omen…

"Hey hon. Sorry about Mister J. Hope your feeling ok." She whispers brightly. "I feel really bad for you Batgirl. just gonna let you know that I feel for ya. If you need me, just call." Wait, WHAT?


	4. We're not talking about that right now!

OMG, SOOOOOO sorry you guys! I haven't been on in forever, and now people actually care about my story! SOOOOOOOO Sorry it took so long! High school, you know? UHHH!

Sakurahanaalice: What a mouthful! I mean, I was there when you picked it, but… so yup. You're my first review! (Of course you are, you're my bff!)

Luiz4200: I am!!!!!! A few years late, but nevertheless! I am the little engine that could!!!!!

Zedax: Cool name! Sounds… mystical! I am Zedax, all seeing all knowing, and a great reviewer! Thanks man! You totally reminded me that I hadn't finished this!

Disclaimer: If I owned it, then I would have an editor making me publish like every week, not every 3 years or so. So no, I don't.

ONWARD!!! FINNALLY!!!!

"Huh, say what?" I exclaimed. "Who are you and what have you done with Harley Quinn?"

"Oh, Batsy, I never really hated you. That was Mistah J, you know? I just hate you because he does." She replied earnestly.

""Well, that's dumb." I snorted before I could stop myself. Dumb Barbra, DUMB! You don't call psychologically unstable criminals dumb! Rule of thumb number one! You're making rookie mistakes, and you can't afford to. Think carefully. Just because you've been kidnapped doesn't mean you can get sloppy. "What I mean is that your own person, Harley. You're not the Joker as far as I can tell, and so you should do your own thing."

"That's all right for you to say. But aren't you just like Batman? Aren't you his girl?" Harley asked innocently.

"EW, no! Batman's like, eighty! Ok, maybe in his sixties. No one knows. And NO!!! He has no clue how to have fun. He just sits around all day. He can't even beat me at videogames! He's, like, my DAD. Not literally of course." I protested.

"Whatever Batgirl. I still know that I love Mistah J, and he loves me, and he hates you, so I do to."

"But you just said that you didn't care either way." I pointed out.

"You're confusing me!" Harley whined, grabbing her head.

"Sorry. So, why do you want to help me now if you hate me?" I asked, treating her as I would a five-year old.

"Well, Mistah J said that we was supposed to make Batty-man and his boy think that you was dead, and then when they're all depressed and willing to do anything to get you back let them know where you are, and that you're still alive. But see, it's a trap, and when they come, they'll find you dead, and then Mistah J will spray 'um with Joker gas like thats was in that Joker fish, you know? And then we'll pull Batman and Robin apart bit by bit with one of those pulley thingies, and then we'll have no bats in our belfry! But see, then I met you, and you're so little, and you can't be more than a teenager, and I just cain't kill you!" Harley explained in one breath. "But Mistah J wants me to and I always do what my puddin' tells me, and I just don't know what to do, only you are close to Batman, and he's the world's greatest detective, so you could tell me what to do, only you're biased, and I just don't know what to do!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"Slow down there Harley. It'll all be ok. What do you think you should do?" I counseled, feeling like I should be screaming. How could I so calmly discuss whether or not she should kill me?

"I don't know! I mean, you're so nice, and you ask me what I think, and you don't hurt me, and you're so little! You've got so many years ahead of you, and I cain't , just cain't take that away from you!" She drawled in her soprano. "But Mistah J! I love him! What do I do?"

"Hold up Harley, he hurts you?" I asked. Yeah, I'm the one with blood crusted all over me and broken ribs at least, not to mention a bullet wound, but she's his partner. Whether in her sense of the word or his, partners shouldn't hurt each other. I mean, sure I beat up Robin all the time, but that's sparring, and I don't do any real damage. The bruises don't last…long.

"Only a little." Harley protested.

"Love doesn't hurt." I urged. "Harley, if Joker hurts you, he doesn't really love you. If he really loved you he would protect you from harm, not hurt you.

"Like that little bird boy of yours? Robin?" She asked slyly.

"We aren't talking about Robin now, we're talking about you. And the fact that the Joker doesn't love you. He just uses you Harley. Leave him! Find someone who really loves you." I neatly sidelined her question.

"You're lying to me! Why would you lie, little liar bat? Don't lie little lies-a-lot! Stop saying such horrid things, just don't!" Harley squealed, her voice rising octaves with every word. She covered her ears. "I hate you! Take it back, take it back! He loves me, I know he loves me! _Stop it **stop it STOP IT! I HATE YOU!" **_She shrieked. Nice Barbra. Waaaaaay to go.

"Do you really?" I asked quietly. "Do you really hate me?"

"Well, maybe not. But you can't say things like that. No." She whined, like a child.

"Listen to me Harley." I said. I'm REALLY gonna have to hate saying this, but if humoring her will keep me alive… "Do you think Robin hurts me? Do you think he hits me when I mess up? When I fall do you really think he just lets me? No! He protects me from being hurt, he encourages me to do better next time, and he saves me. True love doesn't hurt, Harley. The Joker should take care of you if he loved you. You're just a girl aching for love, but your man won't give it to you. Leave him Harley! He doesn't deserve you!" Now to turn the subject back to my impending demise. "He wants you to kill me. How is that love? He wants you to kill your friend. I am your friend, right?"

"Yeah." she sniffed. "I guess. You don't hit me, and you're nice to me."

"And do you want me to die?"

"Well, Mistah-"

"No, don't tell me what the Joker wants, do YOU want me dead. It's a simple question Harley. It's ok if you do." I soothed. "But just tell me, **_do you want me to die?_**

"No." She stated. Now we're getting somewhere!

"Do you want Batman and Robin to die?" I asked.

"No. Besides, Robin's your boy, ain't he?"

"We're not talking about that right now. So then do you want me to escape, so that Batman and Robin don't have to die?"

"Yes." She said simply.

"Will you help me?" I asked. "Will you help me escape?"

She paused. My heart nearly stopped in the silence. She was no doubt weighing the pros and cons.

"Yes."

I grinned. Music to my ears.


End file.
